Blue
by darkangel-silvermoon
Summary: WARNING: REID DEATH FIC...Morgan's left to deal. Reid and Review?
1. Air

**I own nothing...**

**this is a song fic**

**Blue October's 18****th**** Floor Balcony**

**It would mean a lot if you reviewed.**

_I close my eyes and I smile  
>Knowing that everything is alright<br>To the core  
>So close that door<br>Is this happening?_

Morgan's breathless as he lay on the bed, staring at the ceiling. He stares at the phone, dial tone ominous and loud- filling the room with it's death toll- the phone's dying.

His heart slams against his chest.

This can't be real.

_My breath is on your hair_

_I'm unaware  
>That you've opened the blinds<br>And let the city in  
>God, you held my hand<br>As we stand  
>Taking in everything<em>

Morgan shutters a sob. He just saw Reid and he was fine. FINE goddamn it! He- was just at Reid's apartment, not even an hour ago and he was there...he was with Morgan and everything was okay.

He kissed Reid before he left and Reid took Morgan's hand and squeezed it tight.

He was fine...

_And I knew it from the starts  
>So my arms are open wide<br>Your head is on my stomach  
>And we're trying so hard not to fall asleep<br>Here we are  
>On this 18th floor balcony.<br>We're both flying away_

They both knew the risk, but it doesn't hurt any less.

Doesn't mean that each breath isn't a struggle.

That Morgan knows how to deal any better.

_**Reid lay his head on Morgan's stomach- they both look up at the stars trying so hard not to doze off. The stars wink and nod in the open air- Gideon's cabin their way of escaping the pressures of their jobs. The stress and fustration melts away as Morgan slowly runs his fingers through Reid's hair- loving the silky slide of his fingertips.**_

_**Reid sighs as he looks up at Morgan and smiles.**_

_So we talked about mom's and dad's  
>About family pasts<br>Just getting to know where we came from  
>Our hearts were on display<br>For all to see  
>I can't believe this is happening to me<em>

_**They wanted to get away from it all. **_

_**And somehow they got on the topics of family- and Morgan and Reid let the words ebb and flow in the Mountain air.**_

_**It was beautiful.**_

_**Morgan told Reid more about his family, and Reid about his own.**_

_**They were opening up more than ever- and Morgan never felt anything like this before. He wanted Reid to know everything about him- and he wanted know all there was about Reid.**_

And now he's gone.

_And I raised my hand as if to show you that I was yours  
>That I was so yours for the taking<br>I'm so yours for the taking  
>That's when I felt the wind pick up<br>I grabbed the rail while choking up  
>These words to say and then you kissed me...<br>_

They were going to tell the team about them...their families-

it just doesn't make any sense.

Morgan curls on his side, touching the place where Reid should be. His body shakes and with each cry- his heart breaks that much more.

_**It was Reid who had kissed him first- the warm breeze traced across their skin as Reid laced his fingers through Morgan's and squeezed. Morgan chuckles softly as Reid sits up, resettling next to him on the ground.**_

_**Reid smoothed a hand across Morgan's jaw, and Morgan's breath hitches.**_

"_**I-" Morgan tries for words, but can't manage to find the right ones.**_

_**Reid licks his lips as he leans in.**_

"_**I'm yours." Reid's breath ghosts over Morgan's lips as Reid's brushes his against them.**_

_I knew it from the start  
>So my arms are open wide<br>Your head is on my stomach  
>And we're trying so hard not to fall asleep<br>Here we are  
>On this 18th floor balcony...<br>We're both flying away._

Morgan tries to catch his breath but it's too much.

Someone took Reid's life.

Someone-

_And I'll try to sleep  
>To keep you in my dreams<br>'til I can bring you home with me  
>I'll try to sleep<br>And when I do I'll keep you in my... dreams  
><em>

Morgan closes his eyes and he sees him- Reid.

He needs him here. HE NEEDS HIM HERE!

And that's never going to happen now.

There's so many things-

So many things not done, not said...and now it's too late.

_I knew it from the start  
>So my arms are open wide<br>Your head is on my stomach  
>And we're trying so hard not to fall asleep<br>So here we are  
>On this 18th floor balcony, yeah<br>I knew it from the start  
>My arms are open wide<br>Your head is on my stomach  
>No, we're not going to sleep<br>Here we are  
>On this 18th floor balcony... we're both..<br>Flying away  
><em>

_**Reid pulls back a little and smiles-**_

"_**I'm yours, you do know that right?" His eyes reflect the moon and the stars.**_

_**Morgan nods, breathless.**_

"_**I'm- I love you Reid." Morgan runs his hand over Reid's arm until it connects with his hand. Reid entangles them together. He kisses the top of Reid's head.**_

"_**I love you too Morgan." Reid settles his head against Morgan's chest, the stolid beat of Morgan's heart drifting him off to sleep.**_


	2. Breathing Space

**I own nothing...**

**I thought this was going in a total diff direction.**

**(shrugs) It happens.**

**I think I'm going to add the team next chapter.**

Deep breath in- hold- release- again.

Deep breath in- hold- release- again.

Deep breath in- hold...

Morgan can't get enough air. Garcia lay a trembling hand on his shoulder.

They've been through this before- always removed though...always some victim that you have vague feelings of sorrow for. All in passing.

It's dangerous to feel too much; to get too close.

Morgan grips the edge of the autopsy's table, trying to steady himself.

Trying to orient himself.

Trying to understand why there was a body... No.

Trying to understand why Reid's body lay still on the autopsy table; as if he were sleeping beauty waiting for his shining knight in armor to kiss him back into existence. Morgan's there, he's willing.

They are there to claim his body. Morgan got the call and his walls caved in.

**7:00 pm- Morgan drops Reid off from the Used Bookstore**

**7:30 pm- Morgan makes it home**

**7:50 pm- Morgan feeds Clooney**

**8:00 pm- Morgan gets ready to relax**

** Morgan gets _the phone call_**

**8:20 pm- Garcia calls**

**8:45 pm- Morgan and Garcia are at the morgue **

The sterile flicker of the overhead light nearly drives them insane- their breathing extremely obscene in this space.

Garcia shutters as her mouth gaps.

"Oh, Spencer- who would do such a thing to such a sweet, beautiful..." She gasps as she runs her fingers through Reid's hair.

Morgan crosses his arms tight across his chest, staring at Reid's torso. Even though it's covered, the image is burned in the back of his mind. Morgan's fist clench and unclench as the words scream in his head.

_I'm sorry._

Clean lines crusted with rust colored blood stand in high relief.

Perfection has never looked so ugly.

Morgan squints...his memory jogged as he remembers. It hits him like a ton of bricks.

"Baby boy, I'm going to get him if it's the last thing I do." Morgan scrubs his hand across his face as he looks at Reid's body.

Garcia looks up at Morgan.

"Derek, what is it?" Her voice rises in panic.

Morgan hisses.

"The M.O." He nods his head as a chill runs down her spine. "He's out."

He's going tear that s.o.b apart once he gets his hands on him. Kid or not.

He took Reid way from him.

A deadly growl rises in the back of Morgan's throat as he tries to swallow the bile struggling to come up.

Nathan Harris has to pay.

**A/N: If you haven't noticed yet- I don't do more than two characters well. But I'm going to try. **

**Also- instead of wasting time with dropped story lines, the CM writers could go back and revisit the ones that slipped through the cracks or have more potential to reek havoc...Nathan Harris, Amanda Jackson to name two?**

**I'm thinking about doing an AU...a Hitchcock Rope-type murder... would anyone be interested?**

**If you haven't seen it Rope is the most homoerotic thing since...slash itself.**

**IF you haven't seen or read Celluloid Closet (IT OPENS YOUR MIND POSSIBILITIES AND HIDDEN SUBTEXT/ the history of Slash)**

**anyway...what do you think?**


	3. Catch Your Breath

I own nothing...

I hope I have not bitten off more than I could chew.

I want you guys to like this- and I want to do this in the most effective way possible. So bear with me?

Nathan stares at the mirror and gives it a small smile. His eyes are rimmed red, the dark circles stand in stark relief against his translucent skin. Just like Dr. Spencer Reid.  
>He blinks, never more exhausted than he feels at this moment. His body wants to cave in as he grips the handle of the faucet, blood dripping down into the sink, making small swirls of copper in the darkening water.<p>

He sighs, remembering the feel of Spencer's life flowing through his fingers. Ribbons of red as his chest rise and fall, shallow breathing until his brain, his lungs, his heart stops.

He didn't mean to. He really didn't. But he saw them.

He saw Reid kissing Morgan. Reid doesn't belong with Morgan and they all know that!

It was Nathan who had a bond with Spencer Reid. Spencer cared about him that way, not Morgan. This was not how it was supposed to go. He was supposed to meet Dr. Reid at his house and Dr. Reid would be all surprised-like and welcome him in and then Nathan would kiss him and then everything would be okay, because he belonged to Dr. Reid and Dr. Reid to him. He knows this. Morgan knows this and he's being selfish and ignorant and just...

Nathan couldn't help himself. He needed to...

Oh God! Reid's dead. Reid's dead by Nathan's hand and he can't take it back!

His stomach knots in sickness as the images flood his head, the rise and fall of Reid's chest, the rapid blinking as he tries to fight the pain. The feel of the switchblade, sticky with crimson heat. His stomach heaves. This wasn't what was supposed to happen. This is WRONG.

He was going to show Dr. Reid that he was better now and that he wasn't sick and that he wasn't afraid of his mind anymore and that he could control those disgusting urges and that they were meant for...each other.

He scrubs at his hands, but the blood won't come off. He'll never be clean again.

**A/N: So...what do you think?**


End file.
